That Man This Woman
by Katiyana
Summary: It's been over twenty years but they're still apart.


Title : That Man, This Woman

Title : That Man, This Woman

Author : Katiyana

Summary : It's been twenty over years, but they still can't be rid of each other.

Spoiler : The first scene mentioned is at the end of 'Early Rollout'.

Disclaimer : These characters are not mine.

Note : This is not very nice or sweet. It certainly has angst. So not for those who want happy, fluffy pieces. I've posted this before but not on this site. Hope you enjoy it. Feedback is very much valued. Thank you.

Brass' POV

She goes out on her merry way, dressed up, probably for a date. For some reason or other she stopped by his office to say something. I wonder what that was.

I glance at him as I pass his office, with its wide-open door. He has an undecipherable look on his face. It's neither happy nor sad. Cryptic would be an accurate description.

He must know that she's going out on a date. He may be a bit dense sometimes when it comes to women, but that fact was just too obvious. And not for the first time, I feel curious about what he thinks about that.

It's after the shift, so I stop to tell him that it's time to go home. He looks at me blankly, it's obvious that he is brooding over something. Then he says that he will, after finishing his work. I leave, because it's been a tiring shift and it's pointless to argue with him.

When I leave, I know that the same look I caught him with will return. I have offered an ear to listen, numerous times. But he always says that he's fine.

I snort inwardly at the thought. He hasn't been fine since he first laid eyes on a strawberry-blonde beauty, more than 20 years ago.

I was there. I guess his first reaction was lust. After all, she was the main attraction at a strip club for very good reasons. It's a reasonable deduction.

Then something indefinable crept into his eyes. I only found out later that he went back to see her. I was very surprised. He had just broken up with someone and he didn't seem the type. Of course, at that time I had just recently met him. I was no expert on the man.

Imagine my surprise, when he introduces the beautiful dancer at the strip club as one of our new lab techs, sometime later. She was easily recognizable, I am a man, after all. There was no mistaking that grace and that beauty.

She was bright and smart and sassy. Still is, certainly, more mature, more experienced but she hasn't lost that something that allows her to impress people. Especially the men.

I know that Warrick, Nick and Greg would turn cartwheels if she asked them to. Hell, myself and Doc Robbins would probably try to oblige her too. Sara, doesn't like her too much. It may have something to do with the fact that she's after her boss and doesn't have the same kind of influence on men.

As I drive home, I think about the peculiar relationship between the two. Grissom has always stood up for her, no matter the person, or the cost. I find it hard to believe that it's simply because she deserves it as a person, not as a woman he wants or loves.

I can guess at the reason why they are not together. Mistakes can be hard things to undo, especially if you're a man like Gil Grissom.

I believe that in the beginning, it was very true. He gave her a chance, because she caught his eye and she deserved it. He was simply a close friend and a mentor.

But it is very hard to maintain such a relationship with such a vibrant and beautiful woman and not fall under her spell. Most men at the lab had fallen in love with her within the first week. And she had barely paid them any attention at all. She was mostly focused on her job and learning from Grissom. Sometimes, I'd feel incredibly happy just to have her attention for a while.

Grissom had it for much more than a while. He had it for hours on end, when they'd work overtime, so that he could teach what she wanted to know. Her quest for knowledge was insatiable. After a few months, there was a difference in the way he looked at her.

But she didn't notice. She had her own problems. A husband that hounded her and gave her no peace. But she loved the jerk at the time. I still don't understand why, but she did.

There was a period when Grissom began to lose his temper at people. That was unusual. He was usually very calm and collected all the time. I wondered what was wrong with him and hauled him for breakfast to give him a good talking to.

But it was not much use. He was still irritable. Though he tried not to lash out too strongly. Then one day, I saw her face. A lab coat can hide many bruises, but it does not cover the skin over the face.

There was a purple bruise on her cheek, too large and prominent to hide behind make-up. She still greeted me cheerfully. But I could hear the tiredness in her voice and there was a hint of despair in her eyes. Then I understood why.

There was nothing we could do. She refused to bring charges against him. It was a very good thing that Eddie Willows never bothered about coming to his wife's place of work. I was younger and less level-headed. I would've taken a swing at him for sure.

It was a stalemate, that just wouldn't end. But the lab work was unaffected. I think I was the only other person besides them, who was aware of what was wrong.

After that there was a period of calm. I was unsure of why, until another officer told me that Eddie Willows was locked up in jail in another state for a few months. It was a calm period but with an undercurrent of something in the air about those two. She stopped wearing long sleeves and he stopped unleashing his wrath on others.

About half a year after that, Grissom showed up, very drunk on my doorstep in the middle of the night. Eddie had been freed a couple of months back. I thought that was the reason at first.

I think he came to me, because I was the only other person available. In a drunken stupor, he told me that had made a very big mistake. He had slept with a married woman. No prizes for guessing who that was.

I let him talk it out and spend the night on my couch. We never mentioned that night again.

About three months later, Catherine's pregnancy began to show. I had a horrible few moments when I realized it. But on calculation, women usually began showing when they were about four months along. That made it about right. It was Eddie's child, he had been freed.

But I forgot that it was not unusual for a slim woman with her first pregnancy to start showing, only after about five months. That still made it okay, but when the baby came, barely four months after it became obvious that she was pregnant, I sat down and calculated some more.

I was worried that Eddie would notice and start questioning about the child. She looked like a healthy full-term baby to me and I had the sinking feeling that Eddie had not been around when she was conceived.

Fortunately, Eddie never asked the questions. He adored the girl in his own way. He loved her as his own. No suspicion entered his mind. It was a very big relief to me. I don't know whether it was a relief or a torment to Grissom.

He started to become more reclusive after that. He tried not to have too much contact with the child or her mother. She was well-trained enough to work on her own. Then she was put on his team.

He was simply drawn to her irresistibly. He was unable to stop being close to her. But he held back because of her husband. They work very well together.

I think Grissom probably knows that Lindsay is his. In his self-tormented world, he is not worthy to be her father. He told me that he thought that he had taken advantage of Catherine, for the few weeks that they spent together.

I was tempted to tell him that she wasn't that kind of woman. But I doubt he would have believed me.

But they cannot be apart even if they cannot be together. Sometimes, there is a look in Catherine's eyes. But he thinks that is simply gratitude. For giving her a chance at life, at having a career she loves.

She gets so frustrated with him and he with her. But they cannot talk about what they both want the most.

She thinks that she is not worthy. I know that she feels he can do better, than a single mother with his child.

So they both see other people and hurt each other over and over. That man with the serious look, who will never love this beautiful woman, the way she wants him to.

The End


End file.
